How to annoy Harry Potter
by samiecheesecake
Summary: Ways to annoy Harry Potter/Draco Malfoy/Ron Weasley/Hermione Granger. Kinda slashy with the Harry and Draco.


How To Annoy:Harry Potter

1.Ask him if he works for the Gatorade Company (his scar is a lighting bolt.)

2Tell him that Draco Malfoy is _madly _in love with him, laugh when he gasps.

3.Ask him why he doesnt get contacts instead of those glasses, say their crappy.

4.Keep saying their crappy until Ron does the slug spell on himself again.

5.Ask him to CRANK THAT CALVARY BOY!! When he's calm so he jumps out and maybe yelps. (Metal Version Of Crank That Solja Boy, By I Set My Friends On Fire)

6.Read him horrible Harry/Snape or Harry/Ron Fan Fiction.

7.Ask him why he has a lighting bolt instead of a star, claim that stars are WAY cooler.

8Tell him you hate Gatorade, Right after you do Number One.

9Tell him he's to much of a pussy to be in Slytherin anyway.

10.Sing "Please Dont Stop The Music, By Rihanna" constantly whenever he is around.

11.Whisper Clearly to your friends " I dont blame Draco, He and Harry were made for each other". When he's in hearing sight.

12.Set him and Snape on a blind date. Muahaha.

13.Tell him to lean over to your ear, when you actually get to do it, after he whispers "Why am I doing this?" scream "YOU LOVE DRACO MALFOY!! CHEATER CHEATER! GINNY'S GONNA KILL YOU!" in the Great Hall.

14.On his Birthday, in his card, say something about dying from..hm..i dunno...Voldemort?

15.Steal his owl, claim and call it Snowball and that its yours when he asks.

16.Fuck his hair up, even more, tell him you know somebody who has perfect hair, and his is a bird's nest. (Cough Cough,) Tell him that he would set up a appointment for his hair, add that the person who will be doing it names is "Dragon". Oh wont he have perfect hair after that.

17.Send him Secret Admirer notes, Sign Them By, Oliver Clothesoff.

18.Ask him who's sending them, laugh, then ask him if he's going to meet _Oliver Clothesoff_ soon.

19.Hide his wand, give it to his owl, and send it to "Norweiga"

20.Send the whole U.K. Hogwarts Acceptance letters, sign them by, Harry Potter.

21.Ask him how Cedric's doing.

22.Laugh evily while he cries, (Only to do if you think you'd do good in Slytherin.)

How To Annoy:Draco Malfoy.

1.Mess up his Hair, laugh when he screams and searches for a comb and mirror.

2.Call him a "Pretty Boy".

3.Ask him if he's related to Jesse Mccartney.

4.Sing "Leaving, By of course Jesse Mccartney" And tell him how he thought of such a wonderful song, and if it was about Snape.

5.Ask him why he doesnt have a "Pimp Cane" like his Dad.

6.Send him a letter from his "Real" father sign by, Holden Mygroin.

7.Put him in the same spot you did Harry, then ask him if he's going to meet _Holden Mygroin_. Anytime soon.

8.Ask him when the wedding is, when he asks, what wedding? Scream loudly "YOU AND HARRY BROKE UP! NO NO NO NO NO!! IT TOOK SIX FUCKING YEARS TO GET YOU TWO TOGETHER SIX FUCKING YEARS!!" Say this in a angry redneck tone.

9.Sneak a Teddy Bear in his arms while he sleeps, laugh along with the other Slytherin's when he wakes.

10.The next night after you do Number Nine, dump white pudding on his bed, when he wakes, laugh and say "Dreaming about Harry again?", by the way, run out before he notices its pudding.

11.Ask him very loudly why he glares at the "Weaselette" when she's near Harry.

12.Tell him Ron's hair looks better then his.

12.Look in the Hogwart's Yearbook of when he was a first year, point to Hermione and ask, "Is that you?!".

13.Ask him why he and Snape haven't came out of the closet yet, scream "YEAH RIGHT!" when he says thats incest. (Since he's his Godfather)

14.When he yells at you in the morning, mutter under your breath, just loud enough for him to hear "Harry must've came early this morning".

15.Sign him up for the D.A. (Dumbledoor's Army) and send a letter to his father that he does not want to take the Dark Mark/Become a Death Eater, at the end sign by, "Draco Potter."

16.Sing "With You, by Chris Brown" after your done say it was a human telegram from Harry and for him to give you his Halloween candy, after he does, do not explain what "Jordans" are.

17. Call him Mudblood, see how he likes it.

How To Annoy:Hermione Granger

1.Tell her you had a A+ when she has a A.

2.Tell her that Draco and Harry are getting together, after Draco called her Mudblood so many times, but eh? She punched him in the face, what was he supposed to do?

3.Tell her to stop curling her hair so much, it looks like a hundred womping willows whatever the hell its called branches just got stuck and charmed to stay flat on her head.

4.While shes not looking, put a explosive ingredient in her potion, laugh when it blows up in her face, then point to Draco when she looks at you.

5.Call her Curly-sue.

6.Tell her Ron's cheating on her with Hagrid.

7.Tell her Snape's been looking at her weirdly.

8.Sing "Turn off the lights, By Hollywood Undead" Constantly with Blaise when she's around.

9.Tell her Draco got raped by Harry, and say that he's pressing charges, laugh when she gasps and walks away.

10.Spray "Glade" in her Potions, giggle when they smell like "RainShower".

11.Put her on a blind date with Dumbledoor, I know it sounds disgusting, but just imagine it.

12.When she yells at Draco Malfoy, tell him to say "STOP MOTHERFUCKING PMSING ON ME! GO PMS ON YOUR GINGER BOYFRIEND!". Laugh while he gets slapped, but shut up when he glares at you with a red hand mark on his face and shrug "I thought Harry would save you, since you know" Do that click-click thing with your mouth, and do gun motions towards him and Harry, gets him, and Hermione. A little bit of Harry.

13.Give her a cupcake that turns her into a ginger kid.

14.Tell her its incest when she kisses Ron after she eats the cupcake.

15.Read her Hermione/Pansy or Hermione/Snape Fan Fiction, just dont get your hands stuck in her hair when you pull it back, or just secretly cut off that part of her hair, dont worry, it'll grow back..eventually, muahaha.

16.Look at her hair instead of her face when you talk to her.

17.Ask her if she can hide your cell phone in her hair.

18.Keep saying "Pfft" and if you spit in her face, keep saying sorry a thousand times.

19.Beat her at Wizard Chess, do a victory index finger dance in front of her face.

20.In muggle studies, when you do playboy magazines,point to a picture and say " ISNT THAT YOUR MOM?!"

How to Annoy:Ronald Weasley.

1.Call him a "Ginger Kid"

2.Tell him Harry's gay and is dating Malfoy, sorry if I say this too much, but it gets everybody.

3.Sing "Weasley is our king" Whenever he's around.

4.Put a dead spider in his bed.

5.Ask him why he doesnt have a cool scar.

6.Call him "Harry's Best friend" instead of Ron.

7.Set him up on a date with Malfoy.

8.Tell Harry to start calling Malfoy,Draco, set up a peace treaty that he wont be mean to Harry's friends if he does.

9.Follow him around all day, when he turns around, say "Hi".

10.Steal his towel before he gets out of the shower. Leave a I.O.U. Sign it by, "Harry Malfoy...to "clean" a "mess. If you catch my drift, Click-click.

11.Disgust him with Harry/Ron or even the most disgusting Draco/Ron.

12.Call him, Weasley, twice as much as Draco does.

13.Sing "Forever, By Chris Brown" Tell him it was a human telegram from Hagrid, and for him to cough up the stash of cupcakes.

14.Eat from his plate, say that yours is too far away.

15.Tell him Hermione's cheating on him with Dumbledoor.

16.Charm yourself to look like Draco Malfoy, randomly French kiss Harry when he's around Ron, get real into it.

17.Photoshop a picture of him kissing Hermione, into him kissing Neville.

18.Send him a fake wedding invatation sign from Harry and Hermione.

19.Beat him at Wizard's Chess, only this time, do a fully body victory dance, in front of his face, and scream "I BEAT THE WEASEL AT WIZARDS CHESS!!" in front of the whole Great hall.

20.Pretend to kill Harry, get Draco in on it too.


End file.
